Tourniquet: Kagome's Undoing
by houen-aishita
Summary: This is a suicidal fic, so it earns the rating M. Kagome admits her love to Inuyasha, but the hanyou turns to Kikyo, his first love. Is it Inuyasha's choice to go to the claypot? or is it the power of the undead priestess? the ending is your choice


This is a suicidal fic. WARNING character death, swearing, suicide. In the song, "Tourniquet," By Evanescence, it talks about death and pain. The word Tourniquet in the dictionary means- A device, typically a tightly encircling bandage, used to check bleeding by temporarily stopping the flow of blood through a large artery in a limb.

it's unfinished because I want YOU to choose what happens.

Inuyasha reaches Kagome in time and the story can continue to having more chapters. There would probably be lemon (hehe) if this one is voted for.

Or is Inuyasha too late and he finds Kagome either dead or dying.

You pick. Hope you like it. Flames are frowned upon, but I want to know what you think so I accept them

Kagome's eye's brimmed with tears as she watched Inuyasha return from his "firewood collecting," coincidently no lumber in his hands. 'He's seeing Kikyo again.' The truth hurt, but there was no denying it. The hanyou had a goofy smile on his face, telling everyone without words what he and the undead miko were previously doing. 'I can't believe he's doing this. I told him I loved him a week ago and he goes to _her_. I'm such a fool for believing he actually . . . I feel so stupid! Baka, baka.'

Flashback

"Inuyasha, can we talk for a minute?" The silver haired boy blinked at the time traveler who had approached him at the fire. Sango and Miroku were already sleeping soundly, Miroku sleep talking every now and then. ("Will you bear . . ." he started snoring again.)

'Oh, no. Sounds serious. Maybe I should ignore her.' But he decided against it. "What is it?" It came out in the usual pissed I-don't-really-care tone. Kagome was quiet for a moment, Inuyasha already impatient with the girl.

I . . . need to tell you something. I don't think I can keep it in for much longer, or I might blurt it out at the wrong time." Biting her lip, she looked at the person she lover so much. "I have to say it now," she whispered, more to herself than him.

"Then say it! The more you stall, the more stupid you look." Kagome huffed and gave him a nasty look.

"I love you, okay? You, a jerk who calls me name twenty-four seven! A guy who would rather eat than care about what I feel."

The golden amber orbs grew to circles. "Kagome . . ." But no more words came out. They sat there for a few minutes, Inuyasha staring at her, looking shocked, she glared at the ground, thinking about how stupid she was.

"You don't feel the some way? Do you even feel an attraction to me?" He was still silent. Then he came out of it.

"No, you stupid human. Why would I have feelings for you?" He was just trying to protect his pride, but was smashing her heart and soul to pieces without knowing. "You're just a shard detector. You didn't actually think I cared, did you?"

Tears were falling on her face as she struggled to speak. "Well- I-"

A sneer formed on his lips. "You did!" He laughed. "Such innocence. You know nothing." He stood and walked into the forrest. A soulcollecter slid in and out of sight right where Inuyasha was heading.

Kagome continued to weep silently over her humiliation and heartbreak.

end flashback

Miroku glanced over at the hanyou who didn't have the wood he promised. "Inuyasha? Where is the firewood?" the monk asked. Then he realized what kind of smile his companion had on his face. Miroku shot a look to Sango, who's eyes hardened in understanding what he was pointing out. They both shot a look to Kagome.

Her mouth open, bottem lip quivering noticably. Her brown eyes filled with hurt and sadness, tears about to fall. One did, leaving a wet trail on her cheek. She ran into Kaede's hut and went to her bag. It was a ritual since that night. She usually carried Advil and other painkillers in her backpack for the group's pains after a battle. Opening the bag's drawstring, her hand unzipped a small inside pocket. in her hand was one tablet. The other hand brought out the water bottle from the side holder. Popping the pills into her waiting mouth, she took a large gulp of water. Feeling them go down relaxed Kagome instantly, knowing that the pain would leave soon. Instead of a light reliever, she had chosen a more powerful dosage. One T3 would slowly knock out a girl her age, so she had to suffer with knowing the man she loved was mating her incarnation. Lying to herself, she whispered, "Everything's going to be okay."

I tried to kill the pain

But only brought more

I lay dying

-Outside-

Sango tried to console her best friend after she fled, but Miroku stopped her. "Crying is her own way of dealing with this. Let's give Lady Kagome time to calm down. She needs time to herself. But it doesn't solve our firewood problem." They had to get branched themselves because the hanyou was sitting under a tree with a dazed grin. 'Something isn't right. Inuyasha is mistreating Kagome as usual, but he always tries to apologize after.'

After the fire was started a while later, Sango decided to check on Kagome. Peeking in through the grass door, she saw her friend was sleeping. 'Poor girl. She cried herself to sleep.' Eyes narrowed and she turned out again to Inuyasha. Still sitting at the same tree. The taijiya strutted up to him. "You jerk! I can't believe you're doing this to Kagome, making it as obvious as you can. Kikyo wants you _dead_, Kagome loves you so much more than than bitch ever could!"

Staring at the angry woman, he said, "Kagome told me she loved me already. Why are you telling me things I know?"

She attacked. Flying punched landed on his face. "You son of a bitch!"

Inuyasha laughed, "No, my mother was the human remember?"

'What? If he thought I insulted his mother, he'd be yelling. He's totally different.' Sango just left the unresponsive hanyou to himself. No one noticed a slightly stumbling Kagome sneak to the forrest, bag in hand.

-Kagome-

She had woken up to yelling. 'Sango's fighting with Miroku again.' But then the truth hit her. Inuyasha rejected and betrayed her. She grabbed her bag, closing it as she sliped outside and into the forrest.

Not stopping until she reached the god tree, she kept looking back to make sure no one saw her. Once at the base of the giant sakura (?) tree, she slumped to her knees, clenching the bag in her fist. "Damn you, Inuyasha!" She whispered harshly. Ripping open the bag, she pulled out a small razor blade. Breathing in pants, she slid the blade across her slowly, blood escaping quickly.

She got her hankerchief and wrapped it tightly around the wound. Sighing, she reached yet again into the bag, extracting a CD player, pen and a notebook. In the CD player was an American Rock disk, the band called Evanescence. Feeling as if one particlular song was meant for her, she placed the headphones on and clicked the buttons so the song played repeatedly. Listening to the words carefully, she copied the lyrics onto a blank page, not noticing the bandage loosened, blood dripping steadily onto her lap and on the edge of her notebook.

And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal

I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming

Am I too lost to be saved

Am I too lost?

When a crimson drop splattered on her writing hand, she glanced down at the wrist. Wrapping it around again.

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

My God my tourniquet

Return to me salvation

Kagome stopped the music and packed up her things. Standing up and pulling down her shirt so her wound wasn't in sight, she heading to the well. 'If I stay here a day longer, I'll actually so it. I'd kill myself. In just one week, I'm already slitting myself.' Reaching the well, she didn't hesitate. She jumped to the darkness, letting it take her.

Kagome found herself at the bottom of the well curled in a small ball. Rising slowly to her feet, she stepped up to the rope ladder. She reached the top a few minutes later, climbing over the lip and heaving her bag over. "Darn thing is going to be the death of me if I don't do it myself." Kagome slid the well house door open, stepped out and ran to the house without closing it again. 'Inuyasha isn't normally this way. He'll come for me. Won't he?' She shook her head to clear her thoughts of unwanted answers for that question.

"Oh, Kagome dear, you're home so early. You just came back a couple days ago." Kagome just looked at her mom and didn't reply, staring emotionless at her. "Kagome, is something the matter?" Kagome's mother had no idea. The girl just shugged and turned towards the stairs, making her way to her room. Kagome's mom wanted to know what was bothering her daughter, but thought it was best if she had time to herself.

With the bag on her shoulder, Kagome entered her room. Over the last two years of knowing Inuyasha, she rarely stayed at the house for anymore than a span of two days at a time. Inuyasha had always either come for her or waited for her at the well. "That's it! I'll just go stay here for more than usual. Inuyasha is bound to come." She reached into the sack and pulled out her CD player. She opened it and took out the Evanescence disk. Sticking it into her boom box, she blasted the song from earlier. Taking out the notebook that had a few red dots on it, she continued copying the words that filled the air in kanji.

Three days later

Kagome pulled at her hair in frustration. "Why isn't he here? He should've come by now. I need to see him." Kagome ran down the stairs, leapt out into the entrance, slipped on her shoes and was out of the house. She skidded to a stop at the still open well house and stood for a moment, as if she was waiting for a silver haired boy to jump out and say "gotcha good didn't I?" But no visitor came so she stepped into the shelter of the shed and down the steps. She jumped into the well with very little hesitation, assuming her golden eyed prince would be waiting.

Do you remember me

Lost for so long

Will you be on the other side

Or will you forget me

I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming

Am I too lost to be saved

Am I too lost?

She scaled the dirt wall as fast as she could, ready to greet her friend. instead she found Inuyasha kissing Kikyo right in the same clearing. 'He doesn't even care, does he? I've been such a fool!' She let go of the side, falling into the darkness yet again.

Earlier that day

Inuyasha came out of the daze with a feeling he was forgetting to do something. Kagome had again lured him into the forrest and he of course went with her. Ever since Kagome had spoken out her feelings about him, their relationship couldn't be better. He was nervous at first, when she had blurted out her love, but after he found her again in the woods, he knew everything could work out perfectly. Kagome had given him permission to have her, mate with her. At his release, he hollered his love for her into the night. Inuyasha was shocked to find that Kagome was unsatible, the Kagome he was used to was shy and sweet, not brazen like the woman he shared his nights with.

What he didn't get is why Sango picked a fight and screamed at him. 'I know Kagome loves me. I wouldn't be making love to her if I thought she didn't.'

Inuyasha suddenly smelled something. It had a coppery scent and was fairly old. 'Blood?' He lifted himself up, Kagome's resting body under him. He donned his pants and sped off into the night, following the familiar smell. 'Kagome's blood?' When did she get injured?' Sure enough the red stains on the grass did belong to his lover. He would've seen the wound on her body. He did charish her and mated with her so sweetly as if it were the last time, so he did get a great view of her skin. If was as if . .

"NO!" Inuyasha dashed through the forrest and back to where he left the girl he had loved thoroughly just a half hour ago. "KIKYO! You stupid bitch! I'm going to fucking kill you!" Inuyasha reached out and shook the woman roughly and threw her to the ground. "How could you do this! You fucking whore!" He continued to beat her into the ground. The abused miko on the ground smiled wickedly. This made Inuyasha kick her harder.

"I had you first, Inuyasha. My incarnation does not belong in our world. Nor in your heart."

"She does belong with me! You just can't let me go, can you? I already promised to go to hell with you and you can't even let me love some one else for that short of time?" He ran off into the forrest, fighting to get to the well. Kikyo reached it before him for some reason.

"Do you actually think she'll want you back? After all it was me you made love to. It was me you proclaimed your love to. She won't have you. Why not be with me?" She stepped up and pressed her lips to his. Inuyasha blinked once and pushed her away.

"No, you whore, I will get Kagome back. I'm so disgusted with myself, I just hope she forgives me.

YOUR CHOICE! Come on all you have to do is tell me (meaning review) what YOU want to happen.


End file.
